No, I am not depressed

I have never been good with the telephonic conversations, never. I thought I would improve after having travelled far away from home. It’s almost been one year since I left home but I am yet to see any substantial improvement! One improvement though is that I don’t ask “Vechidattuma?” (shall I cut the call now?) every 2 minutes any more. That in itself is a big achievement. But there is a big problem area that I would have to improve upon – “Faking my mood”. It might sound really insignificant. How does it matter might be the question. But when you are thousands of miles away from home, when every word you utter and the tone that you speak in is being taken seriously (which obviously does not happen when you are at home) it’s very important. Because you might end up in trouble like how I did last week.

Last Sunday was one heck of a day. For some strange reason I wasn’t at my best. Nothing worked. I was bored to hell. I tried to read a book but I got no further than the first page. I tried calling up a couple of friends, one wasn’t reachable and the other was not in a position to talk (he was travelling. Don’t think otherwise), even G- talk was deserted. Such was my mood that even “Friends” series was a bit boring.

That is when I had to take a call from my parents. Now, talking to parents over the phone even if I am in a good mood is tricky, let alone talking to them whilst in bad mood. I say it’s tricky because more often than not I end up either giving too much information and get them to worry or give them very little info and run into the risk of answering their wild imaginations. Maintaining this balance is a big challenge.

So yes, my parents called and I carefully (or so I thought) cut the call down in a few minutes saying that I was tired and I wanted to sleep. I didn’t want to let them know that my mood wasn’t upbeat because that would prompt some obvious questions like why? What happened? Etc … I believe everyone would know the pain in answering these questions. My parents sounded like as if they were very understanding (again…so I thought).It also made me believe that I had improved my ability to fake things over the phone.

Imagine how bad I must have been in faking my mood if my father had mailed me the below link saying “an interesting site”
When I saw the link, I was actually fine with it. As in, I thought I had only failed with the faking part. Little did I know that I had actually painted a picture far worse than the actual one. To help you understand the extent to which my faking had failed I have pasted the first Q & A from FAQ’s section in Mood gym (Below).

What is MoodGYM?
MoodGYM is an innovative, interactive web program designed to prevent depression. It consists of five modules, an interactive game, anxiety and depression assessments, downloadable relaxation audio, a workbook and feedback assessment.
Using flashed diagrams and online exercises, MoodGYM teaches the principles of cognitive behaviour therapy – a proven treatment for depression. It also demonstrates the relationship between thoughts and emotions, and works through dealing with stress and relationship break-ups, as well as teaching relaxation and meditation techniques

I had a hearty laugh. Yes! i’ve fooled my father, just that he thinks that I am a little mentally ill now. It doesn’t make a big difference or does it?

4 Response to “No, I am not depressed”

  1. pra says:

    Talking on telephone and trying to show fake mood is an art and very few people posses it! I am also like you! I can't talk on phone and cannot show fake mood.Not on phone and not in person!!
    I think you should tell your perents that you are not depressed or atleast call them when you are in good mood!! :-)

  2. VISHNU says: i think would be a rehab centre..there are some things which u cant do no matter how much u try.. varadhu na varadhu dan.. so be happy with the things tht u can do..

  3. pra says:

    You have an award waiting for you on my blog! Please collect it!

  4. Govind says:

    @prashansa - thanks a lot... :) thanks for the award... :) I have one more to put up on my blog now :) and I did speak to my parents after that...things are back to normalcy now

    @vishnu - yeah :) varadhu nu dha vittuten...but as u scared that i might be sent to rehab :)

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